Recently, CEO Marissa Mayer engaged in a discussion with reporters and analysts about Yahoo’s last business quarter, and when asked about the company’s layoffs, she referred to management’s choices as a “remix” of her company. Obviously, some marketing guru/moron probably encouraged her to use terminology that actually did more damage than good. Here are a few other potential mistakes that she and her peers might want to avoid in the near future:
- Construct a valid argument about the chosen technical direction for the company, rather than simply stating “YOLO”.
- Avoid referring to anyone who doubts your company’s potential competitiveness as simply “wacked out on flakka”.
- Do not announce that you’re about “to drop” your next earnings report within the next week.
- Refrain from announcing your CFO on conference calls as “your bottom bitch”.
- If you sell or purge a division within the company, “cause they didn’t have mad swag” will not be a sufficient explanation for your actions.
Peter Bolton is the author of Blowing the Bridge: A Software Story and has also been known to be a grumpy bastard on occasion.