God theLord = new God();
ThyNeighbor thyNewb = new ThyNeighbor();

1. Original: Thou shalt have no other gods before me

   Code:
   
std::list<God> AllOtherGods = new std::list<God>();
AllOtherGods.insert(AllOtherGods.begin(), theLord);


2. Original: Thou shalt not take the name of the Lord thy God in vain

   Code:
   
#include
WINDOW *scrn = initscr();
mvaddstr(0, 0, theLord.name.c_str());


3. Original: Remember the Sabbath, to keep it holy

   Code:
   
mktime(&timeStruct);
if (!timeStruct.tm_wday)
return “Get Your Ass to Church”;


4. Original: Honor thy father and thy mother

   Code:
   
pid_t PID = 0;
PID = fork();

   if (PID == 0)
pthread_yield();


5. Original: Thou shalt not kill

   Code:
   
! kill(thyNewb.pid)


6. Original: Thou shalt not commit adultery

   Code:
   
std::tuple<ThyNeighbor> MyWife = new std::tuple<ThyNeighbor>();
std::tuple<ThyNeighbor> YourWife = new std::tuple<ThyNeighbor>();
! MyWife.swap(YourWife);


7. Original: Thou shalt not steal

   Code:
   
pthread_t this_thread = pthread_self();
!(pthread_setschedparam(this_thread, SCHED_FIFO, &params));
!(void* allOfIt = malloc(137438953472));


8. Original: Thou shalt not bear false witness against thy neighbour

   Code:
   
bool bearFalseWitness(bool truth) { return !truth; }

   bool theTruth = true;

   if (theTruth != bearFalseWitness(theTruth)) goto HELL;

…Which leaves the last two:

• Thou shalt not covet (neighbor’s house)
• Thou shalt not covet (neighbor’s wife)

I’m having a hard time with those. Any readers out there have any good ideas as candidates? 🙂

Peter Bolton is the author of Blowing the Bridge: A Software Story and has also been known to be a grumpy bastard on occasion.